Vintage Lies and Tangled Webs

Oh what a tangled web we weave, when we practise to deceive.

Lying comes in different forms ranging from the little white lie, the porky pie, the fib or half-truth to the big brazen bare faced variety. Some roll off the tongue to spare people’s feelings whilst others are told to save ourselves….think Lance Armstrong, Tiger Woods, politicians.

In the scale of lying there is a gaping void between claiming the tasteless meal you just ate was delicious, and breaking the Oath made from the witness stand in a court room. It may be that you have been the one to tell the lie or the one on the receiving end. Either way dishonesty has a habit of rearing it's ugly head.

What is the correct term for a situation where an individual intentionally misleads you for their own advantage? They know something that you don’t, but they choose not to tell you in order to get what they want. Does that count as a lie or does it depend on your own moral compass? Does it matter if those involved are strangers, or friends, or lovers?

What about vintage lies? Does discovering now that someone lied to you years ago have little or more punch? Does it sting less when you no longer have the liar in your life? Do you confront the liar and ask them about it? Would you believe their explanation? Does it really matter now?

I've heard of skeletons in the closet but being slapped in the face with a vintage lie is a new experience that I encountered just recently. This vintage lie was told many moons ago by someone who I now rarely see but still have the highest respect and affection for. A person I considered to be a straight talker, one of the good guys, someone I could trust.

The truth was revealed by sheer chance, a random conversation about the past. I doubt the lie was told with malicious intent but it definitely hid the truth and in doing so was unfair and very selfish.

Am I angry about it? I probably should be, but no, I'm not angry.

Am I surprised? Yes, quite shocked in fact.

Am I disappointed? I'm absolutely gutted.

I've had plenty time to think about it and think about my feelings for this person. What did I learn from this experience? Well it's simple - Pedestals are for vases, not people. Everyone makes mistakes, some forgiveable, some not.

What would I like the liar to learn?.... That tangled webs are for spiders and when you really care for someone, they deserve the truth, even if it hurts.

Honesty is always the best policy.